...so many lives were forever changed. While the majority of Americans won't remember the accident, those that were involved will never forget. The tragedy at Pope AFB on March 23, 1994 still holds a vivid spot in my mind. Of course, I was on a train from Albany, NY to Fayetteville, NC at the time of the accident and had no clue how significantly my life would change once I stepped off that train. I was simply going down to visit my new boyfriend during my spring break. Jason was a lieutenant in the 82nd Airborne and of course LOVED to jump out of planes...a fact that was more than a little concerning to me. He had a jump scheduled for the day that I was arriving...I jokingly said that he had better be there to pick me up at the train station since he had gone on and on about the seediness of that area of town. Imagine my surprise when I make my way out of the train and he's not there. Okay, so I figured he was late and after about 14 hours on a train I did not find it amusing. As the platform cleared I noticed a uniformed man walking toward me..."Are you Ashley?"...my life was never the same. This young lieutenant who stood before me was trying to explain the events that had gone on while I sat on that train. My mind was a blur and all I heard was "crash", "burned", "hospital", and "but he's okay". I was in such a fog that my first thought was that this was some sort of practical joke since I had made a point to say "you had better be there". There was no joke. In fact it was so far beyond anything I could fathom or had encountered in my life at that point that I just sort of followed him in a haze of disbelief. I had never had any sort of dealings with the military before this. It was never a part of my life. I have to say, the tight-knit community that is the Army (and I'm sure all of the other branches as well) is truly amazing and awe inspiring. These people had never met me, yet they cared for me as if we'd known each other a lifetime.
As we headed to the hospital I was terrified. I'm not known for my ability to handle hospital type things. I'm not a blood and guts kind of girl...I'm the one who gets grossed out by all of that. And yet there I was, headed into a hospital bay full of injured soldiers...one of them with a familiar face. He was burned. His face swollen and peeling, his hands wrapped as well as his back. He certainly did not look much like the person I had seen a few times before. As I looked around all I could see were wounded soldiers. Some were missing limbs, one was missing an ear, many were burned...it was surreal. Suddenly I'm thrust into this completely foreign situation and realized that it was on me to be strong and supportive and nurturing. His parents knew nothing about me...didn't even know I existed...and there I was having to call his mother to give her updates on his condition. Being what I would come to know as "typical Jason", he told his mom that he just needed a few Tylenol and he'd be fine. He had burns that would require grafts...I don't think Tylenol was the answer. So I had to tell her the REAL situation and that she should probably come out to be with him. So goes the first meeting of the parents. Again, a surreal situation. I felt like I barely knew this person except through months of letters, phone calls and a few visits and here I was in a position of caretaker. The odd thing was that it felt like it was where I was supposed to be.
My few day trip turned into a week during which I realized that I was capable of a lot more than I had ever given myself credit for. It's amazing what you can find within yourself when you have to. There was so much pain in that room and yet so much relief. 23 of their fellow soldiers died on that day...one would die almost a year later from his significant burns. I learned more about burns in that short time than I ever cared to know. I can't imagine going through that level of pain. Jason was amazing through it all. The bandage changes, the debreeding, the horrible pain both physical and I would imagine emotional...he was truly inspiring.
There are two moments during that week that truly stick out in my mind. The first is when President Clinton came to visit the wounded soldiers. I sat in a chair next to Jason's bed and the President stood behind me, hand on my shoulder, offering his condolences, praise and admiration. It was then that he asked Jason if I was his wife to which he responded "no Sir, this is my girlfriend". We hadn't really gotten that far in our relationship to talk about that, but I figured since he said it to the President it must be true!
The other moment was definitely more poignant and unbelievably moving. During that week there was a mass memorial service for all of those fallen soldiers. It was in what I think was a gymnasium and was overflowing with mourners. It was absolutely packed full and there were many people who had to listen from outside. Again, this was something that I had never experienced in my life. A memorial for a fallen soldier is devastating...a memorial for 23 is unimaginable. Family members cried out from different parts of the gym as the name of their loved one was called out. 23 boots, rifles and helmets graced the stage as a constant reminder of why we were all there. I sat next to my new boyfriend, knee wrapped, hands bandage, obvious physical pain coursing through his body...and watch as he stoicly honored his fallen comrades...most of them were from his unit. The most vivid memory of that day for me was during Taps...this amazing man stood at attention, quivering from pain and anguish, and paid his respects. It was one of the most touching moments of my life and something that I will never forget.
After that week I headed back home as he and his mom headed to Brooke Army Medical Center in Texas where Jason would undergo skin grafts on his hands and back. I think that intense, crisis situations can make or break both people and relationships. That incident defined us and sped up what was likely to have happened anyway. I moved down to NC to be with him in July of that same year and we were engaged that November. We've been together 17 years now and I'm thankful for every single one.
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